最近都不懂为什么变得很想念你。。
也许太爱你了。。
最近我们都有点争吵。。
都是我的不好。。我太罗嗦。。我也太在意你的事。
其实，我在这里一点都不开心。说什么很好笑的东西都是在欺骗我自己。。让自己更好过一点罢了。。
过去姐姐的家我感觉到温暖。 有人关心我。。
但是，回到我的家，我觉得好孤单，好想要你关心我一下， 鼓励我一下，安慰等等。。。
想念真的让我失控。。。
我不是生气你有女生朋友， 而是你的语气让我感到很不安。。
就好像刚刚挂电话，我很想收到你安慰我的信息。。
但是，却没有。。。
让我睡不安。。。。
我今天又流泪了。。
流泪是因为我恨我自己为什么那么不会说话。。
总是直话只说。。很笨。。。
我很笨。。。
我真得很讨厌我自己。。。
每次听到你说累了，我都好想要你快快去睡觉。。
但是我又不舍得说再见。。
我不想失去有人关心我的感觉。。
我很讨厌。。
我很信任你，但是我更怕我会失去你。。
我怕我会接受不了没有你的生活。。
我希望我们不要再吵了。。
我不喜欢这样。。。
Sunday, October 25, 2009
no subject
dear, 最近我们时常都在斗口角.
这种感觉让我觉得不舒服.
有很多时侯都惹你不开心, 感觉我们的距离好象越来越远了.
对不起,我始终还是不够温柔体贴.
有时候就太过理智,导致忽略了你的感觉.
每次都在你发脾气后才醒觉.
原来我还是不会维持我们的关系.
我会努力学习的, 至少减低我们斗口角吧.
但,你知道吗,我希望的爱情,是成熟的.
不要动不动就发脾气(这一点我也会改进)
这样会把我们的关系弄僵了,搞到彼此都不开心
粘也要看场合,处境.
我很喜欢粘你,更喜欢给你粘.
只要和你在一起就很开心.
但是,有时候我希望有什么处境时,可以成熟的考虑,粘或不粘.
或许我较老,思想太过成熟吧.
但,最最最最重要的是,好好商量沟通.
我身为一个正常人,有女性朋友也是正常的嘛
况且我是一个推销员,有时会约些女性朋友,客户出来的
希望你能体会.
就如同你跟你的course rep,chao chuan等男性朋友出街吃饭
难到我又必须生气吃醋吗?
我对你信任,难到不好吗?
还是你不够信任我?
在槟城时,叫你坐我的motor真的好难
但,在那儿,怎么啦,你却能开心的骑着
就是因为我懂,那儿只有motor啊
我从不想计较,就不代表我不在乎
我都在尝试包容接受.
爱你,我是一定会爱你的了
每次你送东西给我,弄我们的贴纸,我都很开心
只是我不大会表达出来
我希望你是最后一个女友,直到人生的终点站.
我们一起努力,好吗?
dear...
dear...
dear...
dear...
dear...
dear...
dear...
dear...
dear...
我爱你...
Monday, October 19, 2009
16-19 october
我的心声
16日 中午
我终于等到这一天了。。
我的老公来找我，真的很开心。。
开心到上课也希望快快放学，回家等待他的到来。
今天朋友们都只是看到我的笑容而已。。
到了晚上了，我更加开心因为快看到他的时间越来越靠近了。。
信息铃声响了。。。是老公寄来的。。
原来我们见面的时间还有一小段的距离。。
他说凌晨六点才找我。。真的有点失望！但是，我对自己说，没关系，见到他就行了！
等待他的那个晚上，真的睡不着。。只希望待会儿张大眼睛就看到他。。
信息铃声又响了。。
他说他要来找我了。。
那时的我虽然还很累，但是看到他，我都精神了。。
看到他疲惫的样子真有点心疼。。
不会说出心声的我，只好乖乖呆在他的身边，依赖着他。。
到了地点，只希望赖在他的肩膀睡着。。
看到他睡了，我才睡。。。
17日
今天我们去唱k。。
听到老公唱歌，我的心开心到不得了。。
其实，什么地方我都不想去。。
只希望陪着他，看他开心，抱着他，我就开心了。。
他们总是喜欢dota，从槟城到吉隆坡也正在玩。。
我也陪他们去玩咯。。
今天的时间好像很快就过了。。
真的是觉得时间不够。。
18日
今天一早老公就说要把我送回家。。
开心的我变成一个不会笑的木人。。
还以为可以陪他到明天的我，真的很伤心。。
我还以为我自己可以接受这个事实，原来我是那么容易受伤的。。
一想到回到冷冷的学院日，空荡荡的房间，冷清清的家就觉得好寂寞。。
原来我是一个很怕寂寞的人。。
怕到会独自的哭也不愿意告诉别人。。
去了mid valley 之后，回到家就睡觉了。。
我不愿意睡觉，我很想呆在他的身边，但是，他累了。。
他睡了。。
我也睡了。。
我发噩梦，哭了。。
张开眼睛， 看到天黑了。。
想到老公等下要把我送回去就很伤心。。
我一个人就在床上静静的哭了。。
原来我是一个哭宝宝。。
他进来看到我哭了，就抱抱我。。
我真的很不想离开他。。
我告诉他，我真的很怕寂寞。。
他就答应明天才送我回家。。
19日
早上大家都忙着收拾东西。。
我很担心今天我又会哭。。
我就忍着。。
他送我回家了。。。。
也许他累了，赶时间，怕塞车所以才吩咐我自己走进去
我不懂要如何回复就只好“哦“ 一声。。
到了。。回到冷冰冰的家了。。
他的朋友说把车子驾进去，他才肯。。
好不喜欢这种感觉。。
那个拥抱真的很温暖但是我一定要放开。。
我把我自己的眼泪忍着，和他说再见。。
他走了，我哭了。。
好希望他就在我的身边，别离开我。。
虽然我们只是两个星期没有见面，但是，我每份每秒都想着你。。
把手机照片换成你的样子，让我每个晚上都可以看着你就睡着。。
真的好想念你~
16日 中午
我终于等到这一天了。。
我的老公来找我，真的很开心。。
开心到上课也希望快快放学，回家等待他的到来。
今天朋友们都只是看到我的笑容而已。。
到了晚上了，我更加开心因为快看到他的时间越来越靠近了。。
信息铃声响了。。。是老公寄来的。。
原来我们见面的时间还有一小段的距离。。
他说凌晨六点才找我。。真的有点失望！但是，我对自己说，没关系，见到他就行了！
等待他的那个晚上，真的睡不着。。只希望待会儿张大眼睛就看到他。。
信息铃声又响了。。
他说他要来找我了。。
那时的我虽然还很累，但是看到他，我都精神了。。
看到他疲惫的样子真有点心疼。。
不会说出心声的我，只好乖乖呆在他的身边，依赖着他。。
到了地点，只希望赖在他的肩膀睡着。。
看到他睡了，我才睡。。。
17日
今天我们去唱k。。
听到老公唱歌，我的心开心到不得了。。
其实，什么地方我都不想去。。
只希望陪着他，看他开心，抱着他，我就开心了。。
他们总是喜欢dota，从槟城到吉隆坡也正在玩。。
我也陪他们去玩咯。。
今天的时间好像很快就过了。。
真的是觉得时间不够。。
18日
今天一早老公就说要把我送回家。。
开心的我变成一个不会笑的木人。。
还以为可以陪他到明天的我，真的很伤心。。
我还以为我自己可以接受这个事实，原来我是那么容易受伤的。。
一想到回到冷冷的学院日，空荡荡的房间，冷清清的家就觉得好寂寞。。
原来我是一个很怕寂寞的人。。
怕到会独自的哭也不愿意告诉别人。。
去了mid valley 之后，回到家就睡觉了。。
我不愿意睡觉，我很想呆在他的身边，但是，他累了。。
他睡了。。
我也睡了。。
我发噩梦，哭了。。
张开眼睛， 看到天黑了。。
想到老公等下要把我送回去就很伤心。。
我一个人就在床上静静的哭了。。
原来我是一个哭宝宝。。
他进来看到我哭了，就抱抱我。。
我真的很不想离开他。。
我告诉他，我真的很怕寂寞。。
他就答应明天才送我回家。。
19日
早上大家都忙着收拾东西。。
我很担心今天我又会哭。。
我就忍着。。
他送我回家了。。。。
也许他累了，赶时间，怕塞车所以才吩咐我自己走进去
我不懂要如何回复就只好“哦“ 一声。。
到了。。回到冷冰冰的家了。。
他的朋友说把车子驾进去，他才肯。。
好不喜欢这种感觉。。
那个拥抱真的很温暖但是我一定要放开。。
我把我自己的眼泪忍着，和他说再见。。
他走了，我哭了。。
好希望他就在我的身边，别离开我。。
虽然我们只是两个星期没有见面，但是，我每份每秒都想着你。。
把手机照片换成你的样子，让我每个晚上都可以看着你就睡着。。
真的好想念你~
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
13 oct 2009
today is the heavy day where i have 5 classes need to attend from 9-6. the time table is fixed some more. T.T
yesterday i planned to sleep early due to classes full for today and sure will be very tired.
yesterday 930 only eat dinner and a slice of cheese cake for felicia bday. after i eat it, i come back and sleep le...this makes me uncomfortable. i haven't wait it digest only sleep and end up vomit all the food out.
besides that, the bed is totally not suits me and i end up with back pain and neck pain. i feel very suffer and then i start cry cuz i dont have enough rest and feel very tired. i look like a kid but i'm really tired and "mang zhang" til i cry.
other than that, roommate keep on bringing her bf to her room and lock the door. a bit lost my privacy but i cant blame her...
anyway, really feel very pain and lack of sleep makes me crazy a lot......mad soon~
today dear dear working 2nd day, hope he can adapt the new environment and start learn something oh...
remember let me see the shirts u bought ya...
can't wait to see my pig pig lou gong~
yesterday i planned to sleep early due to classes full for today and sure will be very tired.
yesterday 930 only eat dinner and a slice of cheese cake for felicia bday. after i eat it, i come back and sleep le...this makes me uncomfortable. i haven't wait it digest only sleep and end up vomit all the food out.
besides that, the bed is totally not suits me and i end up with back pain and neck pain. i feel very suffer and then i start cry cuz i dont have enough rest and feel very tired. i look like a kid but i'm really tired and "mang zhang" til i cry.
other than that, roommate keep on bringing her bf to her room and lock the door. a bit lost my privacy but i cant blame her...
anyway, really feel very pain and lack of sleep makes me crazy a lot......mad soon~
today dear dear working 2nd day, hope he can adapt the new environment and start learn something oh...
remember let me see the shirts u bought ya...
can't wait to see my pig pig lou gong~
Monday, October 12, 2009
Second Week of Monday
This week is the second week of monday at college.
Tutorial and practical class started lu~
luckily i done my tutorial questions d..hehe
this coming friday my dear will come to kl with his friends..
cant wait it anymore ...
hope to see him soon..
ah dear, countdown time : 4 days 8 hours.
Tutorial and practical class started lu~
luckily i done my tutorial questions d..hehe
this coming friday my dear will come to kl with his friends..
cant wait it anymore ...
hope to see him soon..
ah dear, countdown time : 4 days 8 hours.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
My Dear Last Day at Penfabric
Today is my dear last day work for penfabric oo..
i'm wondering how he feel now?
busy briefing or already free whole day and waiting for pang kang only ?
after today, my dear have 5 uniform as his useless cloth.. haha.
the pants also as the mop floor cloth ? haha
I'm happy for my dear because he is going to have his new job, stay own house, save more money, can rest more and also can have more new friends. Really hope my dear will success in his new job oo..
You must be very tired and yet excited for the last day of work at penfabric.
Sure you will enjoy your holiday by gaming whole day or sleep whole day le..
enjoy it oo~
I Miss You~
i'm wondering how he feel now?
busy briefing or already free whole day and waiting for pang kang only ?
after today, my dear have 5 uniform as his useless cloth.. haha.
the pants also as the mop floor cloth ? haha
I'm happy for my dear because he is going to have his new job, stay own house, save more money, can rest more and also can have more new friends. Really hope my dear will success in his new job oo..
You must be very tired and yet excited for the last day of work at penfabric.
Sure you will enjoy your holiday by gaming whole day or sleep whole day le..
enjoy it oo~
I Miss You~
Monday, October 5, 2009
Monday
Today is just monday and ah boy not around me just 1 day but seems like we don't see each other for a long time. This feeling is very bad but no matter how i also have to go through.
Today i attended 2 classes but seems like the lecture already taught 1 chapter d. quite easy and feel that leave the college for half year and come back more easy to study that stick at college for 2 years.
Today I wake up at 730am as usual when i am working. Maybe i already fix the time to wake when working and now i cannot sleep late and feel very suffer if i sleep too long. wake up and realised nothing to do so sms to my collegue. miss them so much and really not used to it.
now, when i wake up, i just hope faster reach at night so i can chat with my dear and see my dear thru skype. this is what i hope for everyday.
i miss my dear even we don't meet for 1 day only.
what can i do just keep on missing him and thinking of him.
keep my wallet nicely so that i can see his face when i open my wallet.
so happy when see his photo is in my wallet.
when only i can see him?
when only i can stay beside him always ?
T.T
so miss him~
Today i attended 2 classes but seems like the lecture already taught 1 chapter d. quite easy and feel that leave the college for half year and come back more easy to study that stick at college for 2 years.
Today I wake up at 730am as usual when i am working. Maybe i already fix the time to wake when working and now i cannot sleep late and feel very suffer if i sleep too long. wake up and realised nothing to do so sms to my collegue. miss them so much and really not used to it.
now, when i wake up, i just hope faster reach at night so i can chat with my dear and see my dear thru skype. this is what i hope for everyday.
i miss my dear even we don't meet for 1 day only.
what can i do just keep on missing him and thinking of him.
keep my wallet nicely so that i can see his face when i open my wallet.
so happy when see his photo is in my wallet.
when only i can see him?
when only i can stay beside him always ?
T.T
so miss him~
Sunday, October 4, 2009
update my blog
aiks..seems like quite a long time i do not update this blog.
Line not good and also don't have free time to update it.
Hari Raya Aidilfitri weekend
we went 1 day trip to ipoh with ah koay, ah yew, ah fai, ah lo and ah yew's collegue.
6am depart from penang to ipoh. very tired but then is a memorable trip cuz we had our dim sum at yoke fook mun and then we went to 3 caves for snapping photo and walk around. after that, we went to parkson and rest a while then go to eat our taugeh chicken and buy some ipoh food come back. when we back to penang, already 7pm lu..after that, we sit a while at ah koay's house and then we continue to go cc play games. after that, we go nearby eat white porridge with some plain plain dishes with it. very nice although it's just white porridge. have a nice trip and tired. but glad to be with my dear at that weekend.
after hari raya that weekend, another weekend i also go to his house overnight because of gathering with thye soon oh..he announced that going to register for marriage at december 25 and dinner at next year june. after that, we went to gurney and queensbay to buy the stuff that i want to bring to kl. sigh.
oct 2
It was my last day at Penfabric. Is a nice company to work and nice staff but a but annoying for those who caring about other's people things. take a lot of photo with my friendly staff and have a nice buffet with all of them. glad to know all of them. at night, dear dear and me drive to kl. i'm not willing back to kl but because of studies, i have to do so lor...ah dear very tired on that day, although i am tired too, i still manage to drive a part of journey. Thanks to my dear dear for helping me and fetch me to kl oh..reach kl already 130am. we went to ah ma's house to overnight and we had our sleep at there with grandma. dear dear, you sure get cold of the small blanket and small pillow o..luckily you come to sleep with me, else, i also will become little prawn at there..haha..
saturday, early in the morning, i busy kiss my dear dear face to wake him up. haha. nice to kiss oo...fat fat de...
after that, the little 1 and dear dear play around d...
aunty and grandma bring a lot of food to let us eat and full full also..
after that, ah dear move my things to my hostel. this room is small, cold cold, hopefully housemate and roommate also nice to chat with and nice person too..
then, realised my x place my things out of his house and feel a little bit angry because he reached home also never tell me. not gentleman enough even act like he is very capable also. don't like this attitude from him.
then ah dear and me move things from his house to ah dear's car 2 times.
later on, after i arrange my things at my house, we went to BRJ eat nasi lemak ayam oo..
when walk to BRJ only realised 1 day passed so fast. a little bit sad because tomorrow dear dear want to back penang already.
no mood to eat my dinner also.
after the dinner, we went to carrefour buy the needs that i didn't bring.
it almost rm100 that i need to spend on the needs i want. then we went back ah ma house and watch movie together with ah ma.
i'm tired after busy with packing my things and i sleep early a bit than dear dear.
then dear dear and me sleep together so that wont so cold at night.
i believe my dear do not have enough sleep because i keep on turning my position of sleeping.
anyway, hope my dear drive safely.
at 2pm, after i clean the toilet, realise dear dear sms me that he reached tapah d.
but i'm still worried cuz still hv a journey to reach the destination.
then, at 4pm, dear dear reach my house to drop by and take my things from my parents.
so glad to have him beside me.
hope i can be together with him for 70years more.....
dear, you are going to sick soon...
remember to take care yourself and drink more water oo
don't drink so many coffee..
remember come kl find me oo...
december i will back your house to celebrate christmas with you ~
muackss...
miss you...T.T
Line not good and also don't have free time to update it.
Hari Raya Aidilfitri weekend
we went 1 day trip to ipoh with ah koay, ah yew, ah fai, ah lo and ah yew's collegue.
6am depart from penang to ipoh. very tired but then is a memorable trip cuz we had our dim sum at yoke fook mun and then we went to 3 caves for snapping photo and walk around. after that, we went to parkson and rest a while then go to eat our taugeh chicken and buy some ipoh food come back. when we back to penang, already 7pm lu..after that, we sit a while at ah koay's house and then we continue to go cc play games. after that, we go nearby eat white porridge with some plain plain dishes with it. very nice although it's just white porridge. have a nice trip and tired. but glad to be with my dear at that weekend.
after hari raya that weekend, another weekend i also go to his house overnight because of gathering with thye soon oh..he announced that going to register for marriage at december 25 and dinner at next year june. after that, we went to gurney and queensbay to buy the stuff that i want to bring to kl. sigh.
oct 2
It was my last day at Penfabric. Is a nice company to work and nice staff but a but annoying for those who caring about other's people things. take a lot of photo with my friendly staff and have a nice buffet with all of them. glad to know all of them. at night, dear dear and me drive to kl. i'm not willing back to kl but because of studies, i have to do so lor...ah dear very tired on that day, although i am tired too, i still manage to drive a part of journey. Thanks to my dear dear for helping me and fetch me to kl oh..reach kl already 130am. we went to ah ma's house to overnight and we had our sleep at there with grandma. dear dear, you sure get cold of the small blanket and small pillow o..luckily you come to sleep with me, else, i also will become little prawn at there..haha..
saturday, early in the morning, i busy kiss my dear dear face to wake him up. haha. nice to kiss oo...fat fat de...
after that, the little 1 and dear dear play around d...
aunty and grandma bring a lot of food to let us eat and full full also..
after that, ah dear move my things to my hostel. this room is small, cold cold, hopefully housemate and roommate also nice to chat with and nice person too..
then, realised my x place my things out of his house and feel a little bit angry because he reached home also never tell me. not gentleman enough even act like he is very capable also. don't like this attitude from him.
then ah dear and me move things from his house to ah dear's car 2 times.
later on, after i arrange my things at my house, we went to BRJ eat nasi lemak ayam oo..
when walk to BRJ only realised 1 day passed so fast. a little bit sad because tomorrow dear dear want to back penang already.
no mood to eat my dinner also.
after the dinner, we went to carrefour buy the needs that i didn't bring.
it almost rm100 that i need to spend on the needs i want. then we went back ah ma house and watch movie together with ah ma.
i'm tired after busy with packing my things and i sleep early a bit than dear dear.
then dear dear and me sleep together so that wont so cold at night.
i believe my dear do not have enough sleep because i keep on turning my position of sleeping.
anyway, hope my dear drive safely.
at 2pm, after i clean the toilet, realise dear dear sms me that he reached tapah d.
but i'm still worried cuz still hv a journey to reach the destination.
then, at 4pm, dear dear reach my house to drop by and take my things from my parents.
so glad to have him beside me.
hope i can be together with him for 70years more.....
dear, you are going to sick soon...
remember to take care yourself and drink more water oo
don't drink so many coffee..
remember come kl find me oo...
december i will back your house to celebrate christmas with you ~
muackss...
miss you...T.T
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